Dear Melissa,

Pink Panther here. Yeah, your under-appreciated iMac. My issues with you started the day I arrived at DDA. It feels just like yesterday when we first met. You was smiling at me all excited and I thought life would be grand. Then you gave me the name “the Pink Panther”. I’m a girl Mac not a boy Mac!! I don’t need any SEO keywords to help me do a google search; I know you named me after a male cartoon character.

Anyway, you treat me horribly! You’d think I’d get paid to do all of the work I’m forced to do. You could at least say ‘good morning’ to me when you come into work. But nooooo, you just push my button, forcing me awake just so you can slow me down with all of your ‘designing’. Let me tell you something, I don’t like it when all my programs are opened up at one time! Do you know how queasy I get when you have Photoshop, Illustrator, inDesign, Dreamweaver, iTunes, Fetch and Safari running all at once? And to top it off, you have 4-5 files open in each program! You make me sick! Have some consideration for my RAM. Just because I was bought doesn’t mean you own me.

I do get my moments of rebellion in though. He he he, remember all those kernel panics? Yeah, thought you’d appreciate those. And how about all those times when my precious little multicolored spinning disk halts your activity. Oh, oh, and the time I take ‘off’ every day around 4pm, just because. (That’s when I slow down so you have to wait 10 minutes for everything.) Call it my coffee break. Yeah, I do see all your exasperated looks.

Ok, so maybe you aren’t THAT bad. You do kinda talk to me. You make me laugh at all of your vain attempts to threaten me into submission. And I don’t mind helping you design for print, mailers and web and building websites. You keep me somewhat organized…even though your archiving attempts don’t really clear much space… but I’d still like to come to a compromise. Spare my RAM and close those files you aren’t working on and programs you are finished using. Maybe then I’ll see how I feel about my ‘coffee breaks’.

Thanks,
Your iMac ……..the Pink Panther….

P.S. Please don’t call me Maccy anymore.